yesterday was such a long day. still i managed to finish it in Tottenham with a little song. what seems so sporadic and unorganised, we spend dozens of hours trying to map and ascertain meaning. this can be useful, and then harmful, if stretched too thin. i like the balance in a developing artistry (for that is one’s entire life) through both the subconscious intuitive creation, and the conscious, slow, steady planned project type creation.

the former offers a means for us to study ourselves – pick your media and your tools, give yourself a limitation to refine your attention, and throw the paint at the canvas. i am equally as excited to see the ending as you are, and even more intrigued to study the why in what was created. there is much to learn about yourself, and everyone around you. i think this style of creation is most reflective of the world as much as it is of you. perhaps this is the connected stream of consciousness they speak of.

and then the latter, this is what i spend most of my time worrying about, thinking, planning, preparing, all in my best attempt to show off my understanding and capacity, in the most effective/complex/simple way of explaining some concept, or emotion. i see my life as the collage of all of these, hoping to form a pretty little patchwork quilt of my life’s work all connecting together thematically in a steady progressing narrative. not just music, every media i work with or write in.

i exist for it, and hope to live fully and joyously with those around me in the process. i reckon it looks pretty cool.