until my birthday. that’s always such a strange time in my life, i never know exactly quite to feel. expectations kill, and i don’t much feel the need for something big this year – thankfully, kaleb showed me that last year, and it was all i could have ever asked for.
now i simply want to enjoy the moment of it, and go back to work. getting some more feeling into the tangible.
it’s a gracious phase of life i am in currently (and on an optimistic morning, i consider that they all are). i may take each day as it comes, and take in much inspiration, see much. as much as i love staying at home in my own comfort, working on sounds or writing and what not, it really is so important to leave home often to see a new perspective. fresh your mind and take it that which you would never have seen. and you know, getting daylight to balance the circadian rhythm and that. isn’t that unbelievable how far we have gone from the ancestral ways of our people, that we must remember the benefits of simply living in the natural world.
engineering seems to be going well – i ought to make a separate site for this work to make a clear distinction between my own personal creative endeavours, and the practise of bringing the best out of someone else’s work. that is pure analytical service.
as usual, my mind will oscillate between the different degrees of self thinking, but each day is a lesson on how to better rein in the wildness of the mind, to allow yourself to function clear and happier. as best as you can try, at least. maybe one of the ‘big objectives’ in the human experience is keeping a hold on the mind, keeping it from going astray, to have a clear awareness of the moment and itself. it seems to be one of the greatest challenges, more and more each day as we continue to live unnaturally in this plastic world we have created, with its bombardment of media that seeks to shift our state of perception.
lower the frequencies, as they say. but think what that would really manifest in you, considering the main effects of each waveform in your brainwaves. there is much we can do if we are strict in what we allow ourselves to consume, and refine our focus.
my discipline has wavered over time. all we can do is try again, and keep it as clear as possible.
but i’m off on a tangent again, and ought to look up to the sky once or twice today, and maybe read rather than continually bombard my thoughts into writing.
just do what you can today. whatever you do, do it with awareness.
tk